Archive | February 2014

All mom, all the time

By RuthAnn Hogue/Whiptail Publishing

The kitchen faucet was running and the floor was flooded again today when I got home from an errand. Sigh. This was after we both went to see Mom’s doctor and I fed her a nice hot lunch. She decided to stay home while I was out turning in paperwork with the Veteran’s Administration on her behalf.

Screen shot 2014-02-27 at 5.48.02 PMAs for the flood, I got it all cleaned up in time for the Adult Protective Services visit. This has been an all-mom day. I am still not done. There is more paperwork to finish and a prescription to pick up at the pharmacy. I’m exhausted.

(Oh, we had a bit of a flood in the bathroom this morning as well, but that was OK. She was taking a shower bath and caught me with the sprayer several times drenching me below the knees. Hey, she came out clean. I have no complaints on that one.)

beef fajitas

RuthAnn Hogue is the owner and founder of Whiptail Publishing’s WebTechGirl.com and BookTrailerCentral.co. She is an award-winning author and journalist with an Internet Marketing Master of Science and a B.A. in Journalism/Political Science.


Mom dreams of waltzing

By RuthAnn Hogue/Whiptail Publishing

I love my mom. When she tells untruths it is because she believes they are reality. It’s a shame her reality is so far from the truth. This morning she was wishing she could walk places all by herself, like she used to before she moved here. It’s as if my house is the reason she can’t, rather than her being in my house because she was no longer able to be independent.

That’s old news. We go through that scenario fairly often. Today she included the latest twist that if only someone would take her to a dance she could waltz the night away. Sigh. I keep looking. I don’t see any senior dances listed anywhere online. “It’s not fun growing old,” she said, adding her now trademark sign off. “I guess I might as well go to my room and die.”

The almost-topper for today though is that when I came to bring her morning medicine I overheard her telling someone that I no longer believe in God. I don’t know where she gets this stuff.

That leaves only the highlight which came in conjunction with me showing her YouTube videos of grandmothers dancing right in their own living rooms. One of them was of a 90-year-old woman who looked as if she might weigh all of 90 pounds if soaking wet.

“See, Mom,” I said. “She’s eleven years older than you and she’s dancing. It’s not about being old. It’s about staying active and exercising.”

“I bet she eats,” Mom quipped, ignoring the pile of eggshells and orange peels on the table to her right.

Yeah, Mom. I bet she does.

RuthAnn Hogue is the owner and founder of Whiptail Publishing’s WebTechGirl.com and BookTrailerCentral.co. She is an award-winning author and journalist with an Internet Marketing Master of Science and a B.A. in Journalism/Political Science.


Mom: ‘No one cares about me anymore’

 

Mom visits Sterling House, which she says is a place she'd like to live.

Mom visits Sterling House, a place she’d like to live.

By RuthAnn Hogue/Whiptail Publishing

I walked in on my mom telling one of my siblings this morning in her weepiest voice, “I don’t know if  [RuthAnn] cares about me anymore.”

I have no idea what was said on the other end of the line while I was waiting to tell mom her breakfast was ready and waiting. Once I did, she spoke into the phone words of endearment. “I love you. You’re the most special person.”

“Mom, do you really think I don’t care about you?” I queried.

“I don’t think anyone cares about me,” she replied, not once noticing the irony of those words following a conversation during which she had just felt like someone cared.

“Why?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” she said, before quickly changing the subject.

“What do you have for me anyway for breakfast?”

“Cereal.”

My mom has been craving cereal, so this was good news. She decided to open up a bit.

“I miss Orange Drive. I could walk everywhere from there.”

It seems my mom is missing her independence more than usual this morning. She is blaming her discontent with no longer being able to walk everywhere she’d like to as she once did on the fact that she no longer lives in the home on Orange Drive where she raised her children. Regardless of where she lives, those days are gone.

I’m working hard to find somewhere where she will be more comfortable and have more socialization, etc. I know it is the disease talking. I just wish once in a while she would realize that the person who is actually here helping her with daily life does care about her at least as much as the one who calls daily for tid-bits regarding what might be going wrong.

Yeah, I know that is about as likely as my mom being independent again. She has always loved her first born most. That will never change. He could set me on fire and she would still find a way to justify it and call him special.

I love her anyway.

OK, well, it’s time to get ready for work. It’s time to shine.

RuthAnn Hogue is the owner and founder of Whiptail Publishing’s WebTechGirl.com and BookTrailerCentral.co. She is an award-winning author and journalist with an Internet Marketing Master of Science and a B.A. in Journalism/Political Science.